Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Monday, January 21, 2008
finals
are officially
stressing me out
trying to calm down with the help of God, his word, Jason Upton, Desperation Band, and Misty Edwards. haha. so far its working pretty good.
stressing me out
trying to calm down with the help of God, his word, Jason Upton, Desperation Band, and Misty Edwards. haha. so far its working pretty good.
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
so far so good-2008
basically God is amazing. these past few weeks have been so uplifting and refreshing.
finals are coming up. i'm busy. but its ok :D
life can be frustrating at times, buti'm learning to give it to God-let him take care of it and do my best to live like him.
focus for the next month- DO.
i want to do more for God. be pro-active. reach out. tell more of my friends about God. continue investing in a few friends.
i also am just starting a book called one thing. written by one of the directors (i think) down at IHOP in kansas city. looks to be pretty good-focusing on getting to know God, other stuff-so far i've only read the foreward, but it looks like it will give me some great guidelines towards diving deeper into who God really is and what he wants for me. i'm excited.
big tests tomorrow-time for me to go to bed. night. =]
finals are coming up. i'm busy. but its ok :D
life can be frustrating at times, buti'm learning to give it to God-let him take care of it and do my best to live like him.
focus for the next month- DO.
i want to do more for God. be pro-active. reach out. tell more of my friends about God. continue investing in a few friends.
i also am just starting a book called one thing. written by one of the directors (i think) down at IHOP in kansas city. looks to be pretty good-focusing on getting to know God, other stuff-so far i've only read the foreward, but it looks like it will give me some great guidelines towards diving deeper into who God really is and what he wants for me. i'm excited.
big tests tomorrow-time for me to go to bed. night. =]
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
a new years resolution
one new year's resolution: blog more. :D
quick update: the past months have been tough ones for me spiritually. With all the stress of school and basketball and everything else, I've sort of pushed God aside more than I've wanted. I've let my life get filled with other things, and I've definitely noticed a change in me. I'm not as happy, more tired, more down on myself-not me.
for a more serious new years resolution- a change in heart. i don't want 2008 to continue the way the last few months of 2007 have been going. i need to re prioritize what's most important in my life: God needs to become my number one once again-a resolution i plan on keeping. i'm so thankful for God's grace and mercy-that no matter what i do, he will always welcome me back with more love than i could ever imagine. I'm excited to live out the amazing plans he has for my life in 2008.
happy new year.
jeremiah 29.11
Thursday, November 8, 2007
who knows...
I'm so sick of people and their mistakes. Especially my own. I hate it how every time i go through something completely awesome for God, the devil attacks me the next day and seems to always win. Its like i can't take a step forward without falling 2 steps back.
Example: last night, awesome message, awesome time with God. He gave me such a burden for some of the people in my school. He was encouraging me, and gave me so much hope for the next few years. I had been reading Matthew 10, about the harvest being ripe, about how its hard work, but he'll help us through anything and everything. Perfect. Insane how He ties it all together...
...then today, i had a pretty good day, but things just kind of fell apart as it went on. My mom and i weren't getting along. Just everything seemed to be going not quite right, and I wasn't handeling it at all. I was edgy, snapping at my mom and not making the best decisions, saying things i should't have said. I dont even really know what words describe it...
I'm so sick of the devil being victorious over God's children. I look around at so many people, and i see their struggles. Ive seen so many on fire for God, who have completely "burnt" out. Life seems to have been sucked completely away from them, and they're letting it happen. All God wants to do is pull us back to him, show us what he has in store for us, show us his love and grace. I see so many that are just turning away. I dont understand how. I want to just slap them across the face and yell at them. Ask them how they can just ignore what i've seen happen in them. I feel like i'm rambling, not sure about where my thoughts are. I'm scared i'll become one of those "burnt" out people. I'm afraid of getting caught up in the business of life: school, sports, in getting a job -- in things that dont really matter. I want to get closer to God through hard times, through rough times, but i'm afraid of my own weakness. My lack of boldness and laziness. I'm afraid of my future. I know what it could be, and what I want it to be, i just don't see how I can get there. I can't see myself becoming everything God wants me to be.
In my life, I want to make a difference. I want to show God's love to the lost and those who are broken. I want my friend's next to me in Heaven. I want to get to know Jesus even more every single day. I want to walk with him constantly, to hear is voice. To find joy in everything. To live my life the way he wants me to...
I just don't know if I actually can.
Example: last night, awesome message, awesome time with God. He gave me such a burden for some of the people in my school. He was encouraging me, and gave me so much hope for the next few years. I had been reading Matthew 10, about the harvest being ripe, about how its hard work, but he'll help us through anything and everything. Perfect. Insane how He ties it all together...
...then today, i had a pretty good day, but things just kind of fell apart as it went on. My mom and i weren't getting along. Just everything seemed to be going not quite right, and I wasn't handeling it at all. I was edgy, snapping at my mom and not making the best decisions, saying things i should't have said. I dont even really know what words describe it...
I'm so sick of the devil being victorious over God's children. I look around at so many people, and i see their struggles. Ive seen so many on fire for God, who have completely "burnt" out. Life seems to have been sucked completely away from them, and they're letting it happen. All God wants to do is pull us back to him, show us what he has in store for us, show us his love and grace. I see so many that are just turning away. I dont understand how. I want to just slap them across the face and yell at them. Ask them how they can just ignore what i've seen happen in them. I feel like i'm rambling, not sure about where my thoughts are. I'm scared i'll become one of those "burnt" out people. I'm afraid of getting caught up in the business of life: school, sports, in getting a job -- in things that dont really matter. I want to get closer to God through hard times, through rough times, but i'm afraid of my own weakness. My lack of boldness and laziness. I'm afraid of my future. I know what it could be, and what I want it to be, i just don't see how I can get there. I can't see myself becoming everything God wants me to be.
In my life, I want to make a difference. I want to show God's love to the lost and those who are broken. I want my friend's next to me in Heaven. I want to get to know Jesus even more every single day. I want to walk with him constantly, to hear is voice. To find joy in everything. To live my life the way he wants me to...
I just don't know if I actually can.
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